MAURICE: Help! Someone help me!
INNKEEPER : Maurice?
MAURICE: Please! Please! I need your help!
He's got her, he's got her locked in the dungeon
LEFOU: Who?
MAURICE: Belle! We must go! Not a minute to lose!
GASTON: Whoa! Slow down Maurice! Who's got Belle locked in
a dungeon?
MAURICE: A Beast! A horrible, monstrous Beast!
BEERDRINKERS:
BEERDRINKER ONE: Is it a big Beast?
MAURICE: Huge!
BEERDRINKER TWO: With a long, ugly snout?
MAURICE: Hideously ugly!
BEERDRINKER THREE: And sharp, cruel fangs?
MAURICE: Yes, yes! Will you help me?
GASTON: All right, old man. We'll help you out.
MAURICE: You will? Oh, thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
[Maurice is expelled]
INKEEPER: Crazy old Maurice!
BEERDRINKER ONE: He's always good for a laugh.
GASTON: Crazy old Maurice. Hmmmmm. Crazy old Maurice. Hmm.
GASTON
Lefou, I'm afraid I've been thinking.
LEFOU
A dangerous pastime,
GASTON
I know.
But that wacky old coot is Belle's father,
and his sanity's only "so-so".
Now the wheels in my head have been turning,
since I looked at that loony old man.
See, I promised myself I'd be married to Belle,
and right now I'm evolving a plan!
(to Lefou) LEFOU
If I .... (whisper) ...
Yes!
Then we'd ... (whisper) ...
No! Would she?
... (whisper) ... Guess!
Now I get it!
BOTH
Let's go!
No one plots like Gaston,
Takes cheap shots like Gaston,
Plans to persecute harmless crackpots like Gaston.
CHORUS
So his marriage we soon will be celebrating!
My, what a guy!
Gaston!
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